Well I'm not sure how to begin, I guess with my first thought. I have been living in Mexico for exactly 5 months on May 15, WOW!!! I guess at first it dodn't seem that crazy or amazing, but all of a sudden it was at though it just hit me and I thought I've been here for almost half a year. How insane is that. I think when we move to a new place that is close to home or close to friends time seems to slip by with much joy because our hearts are there. This time around time has been both extremly fast and excruciatingly slow (sorry if I spelled that word wrong). Depending on how I feel I think "Can this day go any faster, please!!!", or "WOW a whole week just went by with out me knowing." It's crazy actually and this time around I'm in a completely new environment. Here there was no real sense of comfort or familiar face or culture, rather new, everything new. The Lord has been absolutely amazing, transitioning me every step of the way. I've seen parts of my heart I never knew where there, I've stretched farther than I thought I could go, and I loved more than I new was possible. I think the most amazing thing I've learned is this, LOVE. You know there's the saying that, "It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." For most of my life-which is short-I belived in this philosophy and I still do to a point. The difference is that I was never in love but over this past year I've realized I'm in love I am truly smitten, overwhelmingly in love. With who? Well of course it's God, Jesus!!! You know many people say this and it has become a cliche and just a semi-annoying phrase, but I am truly in love it's unbelievable. I have never known anything like this in my entire life and this love has changed me in the most profound way. So yes it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved, but I choose to love and never lose it. Through this adventoures love with my savior and creator I have been able to give over my fears, concerns and regrets but even more I have been able to love others. It's one thing to love some one with a brotherly or sisterly love or even a romantic love, but to love them with a godly love transcends all boundaries. I'm learning to love people with a godly love and it's amazing how they began to be transformed into the image that God sees them. Things just start to fall into place and the things that once made me angry don't anymore, amazing is all I can say. Sometimes I think that I learned nothing in Mexico and I haven't grown at all, but at times like this I realize that I've changed a lot and I'm a different person. The lord is just emptying me out on his alter, what's left is what he finds beautiful and he continues to fulfill me with more charachterestics like himself, THAT IS LOVE!!! "He disciplines those he loves." It's so funny you can truly have nothing and have it all and lose it all to gain it all. So there, that's what's brewing inside, it's not an epiphany or anything prophetic, but it's the spirit working in me, it makes me laugh.
In other news, I am officially coming to Cleveland on June 11th and leaving June 18th at a ridiculous hour in the morning. I am really excited about this because there are many things I would like to do, love to do:
1) Stay up really late with my sister talking about God, watching movies and eating tons of food.
2) Have really beautiful, fun, lovely, long conversations and hang out times with my bestfriends.
3) Say Hi to my dad and pray for him, a breaking prayer a miraculous prayer.
4) Give my brother a HUG and tell him I love him!!!!!!!!
5) Visit my home church, 'Metro Church South'.
6) Spend time at HOP Cleveland, which includes participiating in my sister's set.
7) Recieving prayer and praying for others.
7) And of course, SPEAKING SPANISH!!!!!!
There are 35 days left until I'm home, YAY!!!!!!
I don't know, I'm filled with Joy!!! I know that things will be different when I visit, but different is good, it means growth and something new to love. Miss and love you all, you are forever in my heart no matter where I am or what I'm doing, love like this NEVER DIES!!!!!!
